"Why are you drinking a Mountain Dew," asked the kid in gray.
"You mean Mtn Dew," responded the older man, sounding like foreigner as he gurgled the sound of Mtn in his throat.
"Whatever it's called, shouldn't you be drinking coffee or something? You're like, what? forty nine? Isn't it time you stopped drinking that caffeinated devil's piss?"
"I'll stop drinking Mtn Dew," again the older man gurgled the Mtn awkwardly in his throat, "when you stop bobbing your head to Mylie Cyrus songs."
The kid in gray hung his head in shame.
Joel Samson Berntsen (a lipitor commercial on the radio)